As some one said it right, " anything in excess spoils the taste". Things happening around are making me feel suddenly "why am I even bothered?". It makes me think like that for a while and then it makes me feel guilty. I really don't understand why am I am getting this feeling? I think its just a phase or some times it feels like ego!
The feeling I got was when plan for the trip was one. It was a good time and all was well at the lunch. Suddenly the plan for a trip formed and it dragged and dragged with 8- 10 opinions coming in. The search started and dates were finalized and mails were exchanged. Then from somewhere one more opinion. We are peace loving humans and believe in accommodating everything and everybody. It was dinner time and still the opinions were wrestling and voices all over.
It felt like it was excess of opinion syrup. Felt like crisis instead of fun. Richard Branson says " when something isn't fun one should stop doing it" but is it the right thing to do at this point?
Feels like you are going to break loose, like one is being pushed to the edge of a building which is some 100 story high! The layer of patience looks growing thin. Some part in you says "Don't loose your cool! Well all of them are giving their opinions" Some other part says" they are just cribbing and how can we take the word from them when no body has done it themselves". This is definitely not fun. In all this we are loosing our main item of discussion having fun on the trip!
Suddenly one strange thougth from somewhere... "why am i taking all this seriously?" nothing is going to end if this wont happen. Yes we will feel bad for awhile but when one did his part and it is not working out then should leave it at that, also it is not necessary that all must go together or no one goes. It felt like the initial 5 secs of a free fall. complete silence. like you are the only one in this universe.
Opinions are there to be made and listened to, but when they take over your actual aim then they are not worth it and after all this I am sure about this.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Monday, October 27, 2008
Zonked!!
It happenes once in a while that just dont know what to do, what to follow, or the days existance is in question. We give it many names like Zonked, dazed, lazy day, etc etc. Ever thought why it happens? I have tried many times. Alas I dont think I have reached the answer my self.
The feeling itself is pretty strange and amazing in all. you know there is something to do but you feel tied down and something is not letting you do what ever you wanted to or have to. You sitting in the cubicle of your office or in the class wonder why am I here in fact that is the place you have to be actually. May not be " The Place" but yeah quite confident that it is the right place. Yet that restless feeling and that irritation that creeps in followed by the lethargy. It feels like an tranquilizer has been shot into your system. People try various ways to avoid this feeling yet they fail as they may drive it away one day but definatly it will be back again.
I am still wondering the way to fight this. I wonder if all people have this feeling or only few. Alsoif all have then what do they do on such a day. It actually acffects your attitude as you feel a total looser on such days.
Any suggestions?
The feeling itself is pretty strange and amazing in all. you know there is something to do but you feel tied down and something is not letting you do what ever you wanted to or have to. You sitting in the cubicle of your office or in the class wonder why am I here in fact that is the place you have to be actually. May not be " The Place" but yeah quite confident that it is the right place. Yet that restless feeling and that irritation that creeps in followed by the lethargy. It feels like an tranquilizer has been shot into your system. People try various ways to avoid this feeling yet they fail as they may drive it away one day but definatly it will be back again.
I am still wondering the way to fight this. I wonder if all people have this feeling or only few. Alsoif all have then what do they do on such a day. It actually acffects your attitude as you feel a total looser on such days.
Any suggestions?
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Mistaken Me
The funniest part of committing a mistake is that the human mind starts thinking that its the end of the world.
I made a mistake and my current state of mind is " god damn it! someone somehow fix this, else what will happen... may be i shouldn't have done it... may be i should have told it in the first place... why the hell did I do what I did?", are few things that kill you.
The worst feeling to have at this time is the hope which we have that "somehow it should be alright" . I am unable to imagine what would it feel like if we come to know once the mistake is done and we are not afraid of the consequence, say like what could be the worst, it will be rectified some how right?. Obviously you have not made the mistake of the century, if you did you should feel proud about it, isn't it??
May the feeling of humiliation is what triggers all the questions I have mentioned above, may be the fear of not getting the appreciation. All these are just "May be". If one could train the mind that humiliation is the place where one learns the reason for the mistake and not some immediate fix which might provide the relief but blinds us from the reason. Appreciations can be gained again when you know what you did wrong.
Alas, we are made the way we are mentally where the first thing that comes to mind is panic, fear, hunt for immediate cover up.
I wonder if I would not panic myself over the mistake I made today?
I made a mistake and my current state of mind is " god damn it! someone somehow fix this, else what will happen... may be i shouldn't have done it... may be i should have told it in the first place... why the hell did I do what I did?", are few things that kill you.
The worst feeling to have at this time is the hope which we have that "somehow it should be alright" . I am unable to imagine what would it feel like if we come to know once the mistake is done and we are not afraid of the consequence, say like what could be the worst, it will be rectified some how right?. Obviously you have not made the mistake of the century, if you did you should feel proud about it, isn't it??
May the feeling of humiliation is what triggers all the questions I have mentioned above, may be the fear of not getting the appreciation. All these are just "May be". If one could train the mind that humiliation is the place where one learns the reason for the mistake and not some immediate fix which might provide the relief but blinds us from the reason. Appreciations can be gained again when you know what you did wrong.
Alas, we are made the way we are mentally where the first thing that comes to mind is panic, fear, hunt for immediate cover up.
I wonder if I would not panic myself over the mistake I made today?
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